My wife Allie and I stepped away from our busy lives this past weekend to visit a marriage retreat. Over the course of the past year or so, we have become busy with life. Too busy. We had lost the intentionality of our relationship and replaced it with "doing stuff". The Bible gives very clear instruction to Men in response and care for their wives, (Eph 5:25, 28, 29, etc.) and as I reflect back over the weekend I now see where I screwed it up. Rather then responding to my wife and our life, I had been reacting to it. The difference that I have discovered is that key work intentionality.
So how does that look? Well, Have I cherished her? Do I nourish her? Do I Love her as the Biblical model shows? As hard as it may be, my answers to these questions would mostly be...no. Allie and I have put together some practical ideas to help us live out the Biblical model for marriage. So for you Talian's I ask that you pray for us as we attempt to accomplish what seems to be a daunting task.
So I ask, In your daily lives how will you Think, Show, and React in Love?
6 comments:
***clap, clap, clap, clap, clap***
well done my friend. well done. great post. hot pic.
another verse to add to the gospel proclaiming marriage:
v.32 "This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church."
here's a great quote:
"When we grasp the depth of God's love for us revealed in the gospel, when we rest in the joy of God's forgiveness toward us in the gospel, when we experience God's transforming power in us through the gospel, and when we begin to emulate the pattern of humility and obedience we see in the gospel, what a wonderful difference this will make in our lives and marriages! Nothing is more essential to a marriage, and nothing brings more hope, than applying the gospel of Jesus Christ."
-Gary and Betsy Ricucci, "Love That Lasts: When Marriage Meets Grace"
Did the world just stop or did Joey really read a marriage book? haha
It's awesome that you guys care enough about your marriage to be intentional. In response to your question it seems the best way to react in love would be what you guys did, intentionality. Making a point to daily and intentionally show love to others. I think for me a pratical way of doing this is talking to my mom everyday and asking her how she's doing and how her day is. i can get very selfish with her because i see her everyday and take her for granted and I am not intentional with her at all. Something that simple would make my mom smile i know.
I really liked what you said about the difference between reacting and responding...a few seconds. It makes me think of times when people make confessions of sin and reminds me to not react to their sin and become shocked by it but to wait, think, love the person, and respond. The few seconds (instead of rushing into assumptions or accusations) helps us think and gather our thoughts, as well as reminds us to love.
I have found that the most practical way to love my wife is to constantly have the gospel in my mind. When I realize that my marriage was given to me to help me understand the language of the gospel and that my marriage is a "drama" by which I can portray the gospel to a hell-destined world, then I have the privilege of demonstrating the glory of Christ in my day-to-day dealing with my wife. How did Christ treat the church? He was patient with her, loving, sacrificial, forgiving, nurturing. He spoke the Word to her, gave His life for her, made her holy. What wonderful ways to love your spouse. Easy? By no means. Mandated? Absolutely. Do-able? By the grace of God.
liz,
yeah. i'm gonna start offering marriage counseling. so when you start courting, then come see me. the first lesson is on submission.
josh,
amen. i'm so prone to treat scripture like a reference guide for moralism, then slap on the title "biblical counseling". the gospel needs to be my focus. I can't - He did. I guess "gospel counseling" would be better. Cross-induced obedience rather than law-induced obedience.
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